Developing the Dicknotist Mindset

I got another update from Black Bush not too long ago that allows the perfect segue into a topic I haven't covered before: opening.

Hey Dicknotist!

I'm late on the progress report, but it's the holiday season so I wanted to give you a break.

Anyways ... Whew! That eye contact thing was harder than expected. I'm still perfecting it, seeing what exactly works and doesn't. I had never noticed it before but very few people actively make eye contact. It's somewhat like you have to "catch" them. Societal pressure I guess. No one wants to look "stalkerish" by staring at folks.

At first, I was acting kinda scary, LOL. I'd look, they'd look back then I'd turn away. I wasn't comfortable with it. But gradually over time, I started holding the gaze longer. Initiated a few convos, nothing major. It's a huge comfort barrier to leap over. But I started, and am still starting to get the hang of it. Combine that with conveying sexual emotions through the eyes is tough, but I've seen it can work. Especially being comfortable with those feelings, not thinking it's wrong or being disrespectful in my own psyche. Just gotta perfect it to a T. (BTW what is a 'T' anyways? What does 'T' stand for? I've always wondered that but could never figure it out).

Oh, by the way. My body language and confidence are slowly getting much better. People are starting to comment, still have some things to work out out though.

Well, with that. I hope your holidays are going great.

So, what's next?

Thanks man. My holidays rocked. After seeing the film, Sideways, I was inspired to travel back to CA and go wine tasting with the family. Twas a sweet time!

What's next? Well, first of all, don't forget what you've already learned. Each new mission just builds on what came before it. Since you're already initiating conversations, let's roll from there.

Opening is no big deal these days, but it was easily the hardest part of the game for me. I remember first hearing about pick-up from David DeAngelo's Double Your Dating e-book way back in perhaps 2002, before he even published a second edition. I went on to get his Advanced Dating Series CD set a few weeks later and had my mind blown, but it took me about eight months to muster up the balls to actually approach a girl. Even then, I was frustrated cause the conversations rarely lasted past a minute, if that. Try this:

When you open a girl, ask her for a small request, such as passing you a napkin if you're in a bar or passing you a book if you're at a bookstore. When she complies, smile, lightly and briefly touch her on the arm, and then proceed into conversation.

Opening in this manner does a few things.

1) It trains you to have the girl put in as much, if not more effort into the interaction as you do. When I read "Get Anyone to Do Anything" by David J. Lieberman a few years ago, I learned a concept that blew my mind. I grew up thinking that if you want someone to like you, you do things for them. Psychology research has found the opposite to be true: if you want someone to like you, you get them to do things for you (or allow them to do things for you if they offer)! You may have a hard time with this concept if you're the type of guy who hates to ask others for help. It'll take some getting used to, but for me, this practice has been the most effective in hooking, eviscerating LMR, and keeping her around.

2) It gives kino escalation an actual context. Touch builds comfort. You want her to get used to your touch so that sex feels and becomes natural later on. However, touch is also communication between your sexual core and hers. Make sure the message is crystal clear: do things for me and you'll be rewarded with attention, physical affection, and of course, sex.

Remember, this is just an exercise. The point isn't to focus on what you say or develop this into any consistent technique, but to help you develop the right mindset. Think of it as flexing a new mental muscle.

Let me know how it goes.

-The Dicknotist